It’s finally Saturday and I’m grateful for the opportunity to stay in bed. The last few weeks have been very busy and I can’t seem to shake the exhaustion. For the first time in a long time it’s not emotional but due to lack of sleep.
I have felt significantly different since my return from Maui. Many experiences during my trip changed me and helped me heal. Meeting Doreen Virtue and Wayne Dyer was incredible and listening to them speak was powerful. I felt something shift inside of me.
The time I spent on the beach was sacred. I felt safe and allowed the pain inside to surface. I explored all the sources of this pain, some of which surprised me. In feeling it, I accepted it then forgave myself for anything I felt guilty of. The waves washed away the deepest of my pain, which has not returned. I will always feel pain that Bella is not here with me physically, but it’s not the same dark pain that was taking me over.
My experience on Haleakala summit was another incredible experience. We were there to watch the sun rise at 10,000 ft elevation, above the clouds. Being an empath, I have always been sensitive to what others feel, but I was vulnerable that morning. A woman was behind me and angry that I was standing in front of her and asked me to move (which was an unreasonable request considering where we were). When I kindly refused to move it was as though she threw daggers of anger at me. My knees were weak, I felt dizzy and I her anger felt like pain in my chest. I was searching for my “White Angelica” essential oil (which I use for protection against negative energy) but I couldn’t find it because I could barely see. My new friend who was beside me knew what was happening and walked me through breathing and protecting myself until it passed.
I was there with a group of women and after the sun came up we had a group meditation. Our new friend went around the circle and said a few special words to each of us. When it was my turn, she spoke about Bella. My eyes were closed and I could see a ball of light, which was pure love, above me. The light then entered my body and became one with me. I know it was Bella, and in that moment love filled all of the cracks in my shattered soul. She was with me, in me, and was never going to leave. It was miraculous.
Several weeks after my life-changing trip, I lay in bed and think about these experiences. I knew intuitively that I was coming home to many changes, and now I am watching these changes unfold. I knew my life would never be the same.
The first of these changes became official this week when I accepted a new employment opportunity. I feel that I found my niche and I am excited to start this new journey.
It’s time to embrace change.
Life is good!